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Where Did You Come From LadyElizabeth Tan♥ |
posted on Sunday, October 14, 2007sometimes i feel like shouting things without giving a damn what people think of me. i feel like screaming cause i'm so fed up and then i remember this:i will lift up mine eyes unto the hills from whence cometh my help my help cometh from the Lord which made heaven and earth He will not suffer thy foot to be moved; He that keepth thee will not slumber behold, he that keepth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep the Lord is thy keeper, the Lord is they shade upon thy right hand the sun shall not smite thee by day nor the moon by night the Lord shall preserve thee from all evil He shall preserve they soul the Lord shall preserve thy going in and thy coming in from this time forth, and even for evermore then i want to cry. because sometimes i can say: "i believe you Lord" but at times i look back and wonder why things happened, what went wrong.. i'm afraid now. cause it's october. and despite the many happy memories one may have, i can only remember one. and i don't know what to do with it. wash it away? it's like a stain that's been left too long, i don't want to wash it away. just like how i want to love the rain. but i can't. i just can't bring myseslf to forget. because by forgetting, i will lose everything that i've struggled so hard to hold on to. cause she's the only reason to hold on, or maybe to let go. i don't know. she's gone, it's almost been a year. what do you do when this kind of thing happens? do you sit around and cry? so that her memory will be remembered? do you pretend like nothing's happened but wait till dusk to cry your heart out? i hate the pain that it brings me. but it's the only thing holding her dear memory alive and well in my mind and heart. to let go, would be to lose her. you may say i lost her a year ago, but no, i don't want to think that. you tell me to face facts, so i ask you to face your feelings. you did it for your own convienience, not out of love. i hate that you don't seem to care. and you tell me not to be too sentimental. well guess what. that's just what i am and i'm not gonna change it. i don't want to be like you. never ever. i hate you. and i will do everything in my will and power to make sure i don't end up as pathetic as you. |
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