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Where Did You Come From LadyElizabeth Tan♥ |
posted on Tuesday, October 23, 2007i spent today like a normal day.with the exception of preparing for the lit seminar i went about my work like today was just another day like it didn't matter to me but it did. it matters a hell lot to me but somehow, i just can't show it. it's been one year now. today. it's been a full complete year. and i probably look like an idiot still grieving when these people have moved on. today i saw in the papers that there's a huge fire in california students from pepperdine university were evacuated. i wonder if my cousin's alright? does she remember today? or is she too caught up in the excitement. they don't seem to recall that this time last year, we lost her i lost her i lost my mind. over the pain, the anguish, the fear and the guilt. and i think i'm finally moving on i think i'm actually going to let go but should i really? cause i may lose her. everything about her. all the things i've struggled to remember of her somethings that cannot be weathered or worn away but by letting go, does this mean i'll forget her? does this mean she'll be gone, completely? it's almost as though i can feel it. it's the 23rd of october. she's been dead for about 8550 hours. she's been lying under the mud, under a patch of flowers and i've been wondering for 8550 hours how to move on without losing that small bit of what i hold on to where did i go wrong i lost a friend somewhere alone in this bitterness |
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